Anticipation

Some days I awake with a list running in my head of all the things I want to get done, and I think, "How will I ever catch up?" But lately, I have been waking with the same lists, and suddenly being thankful that I have things to hold in anticipation. I don't want to be in a trap of dreading the workload the way I did in years gone by. I want to be thankful for a day full of things I can do, joyfully. In my teens I had that kind of can't wait to get at it feeling. An excitement that I had my whole life ahead of me. Now I can't help but know that life is waning, and it would be very easy to slip into an attitude of "I have so much to do before I die." But instead, I want to just be doing it until I can't any more.  I want to do things I put on the back burner just because I want to do them, and for no other reason.  It's why I blog, or take pictures or research family history, or watch birds. It is why I always have a mess around my house, cause I am enjoying my home and all there is to do in it. 
I am thankful today for the ability to have anticipation.  I watched as my mother lost hers, and that is what changed her from the mother I knew to the one I didn't know more than anything.  I could change all the outside stuff. Like her forgetting to take care of herself.  But I could never give her back her desire to get up and do something every day.  Once she lost that, she was lost.  I have more things in the wings than I will ever get done, but I hope it stays that way til the day I die. And I will live every day I can, doing them. OR NOT.  As long as I have the capacity to choose. 

Thank you Jesus for anticiption. For the ability to look forward to living a day with you. Help me keep doing whatever I do with an attitude of gratefulness that I am able to always keep something out there that is waiting to be done, if I want to do it.  Amen