Thy Will Be Done….
I was thinking the other day, how on a couple of occasions, someone wronged me and I just said, "Lord this one is above me, I don't know how to handle it. I am going to do what I should do more often and let You take care of that person." On at least one occasion, the person actually died in a horrific way within a day or two, and I was struck by the "fear of God," as the Bible calls it. I, in no way, wanted the person to die, never once thought of it. I was in a fit of confusion for a day or two, wondering if God would have brought about her death. Thing is, what she did to me, was to deliberately try to cause my injury. I was in a place that had I fallen when this person tried to make me fall, I could have died. I wondered did she just want to scare me or was there enough malice in her heart to actually try and hurt me. So all I could do was say, "Lord you handle this. I could be misjudging her." But when I heard she died, and how she died, I had chills and a sick feeling for days. Is this how God answered my prayer? Or was it just her time? Did her reckless behavior somehow hurt her instead of someone else? I still don't know the answer, but I have learned that God's will may not always be the same as my will. Sometimes, in God's will, He allows our reckless behavior to take us to its consequences.
The actual meaning of "thy will be done," is to relinquish to God our lack of knowledge about how He built things to run smoothly. He doesn't expect us to be able to do his perfect will. That is how we confuse things with God. WE get things backwards. It is not that we pray, Lord I will do thy perfect will. It is that we pray, Lord I allow in my heart that you may intervene anywhere, before or after I mess things up, to redirect things toward thy perfect will. Thy will be done. Let it happen in my everyday life. In this way, God is always responsible. It takes a huge burden off me. If God is responsible for my life and how it turns out, why do I often fall into the pit of trying to make life work out for me? It is like trying to play God. And I can't.
Lord: I thank you that I can rest today and let you take care of the God's will part:) Amen.
Wednesday, May 25, 2011
Monday, May 23, 2011
Thy Will Be Done
When Jesus taught His disciples to pray one day, He prayed, "Thy will be done." When I was a little girl, I often thought about whether my prayers included the "thy will be done" part. I was so attuned to wanting to please God. It was so childlike. I have read that a large percentage of what a child does is based on pleasing first parents, and later teachers, etc. This is why children are endangered by an evil adult asking them to be co-operative. Because, children want to please, they like and respond to the affirmation.
As we grow older, we learn that responding co-operatively to everything gets us in trouble. And some adults expect too much. Some parents can never be pleased. My Mom was like that about some things. You just couldn't do enough right. I forgave her, and tried my hardest, but some things were actually at odds with what I needed to do to keep my grades up at school. Like reading, she thought it was a waste of time. Mama never really cared about our grades. Well, I never remember her chiding us for a bad grade, but I do remember her standing up for me once when I got a D in art. I usually got A's and B's, and an occasional C that just tore me up. Not her, me. She knew about me and my art, and she knew I wasn't going to slack in that class. So she wrote my teacher a letter, and one to the principal, insisting my grade be changed. When the teacher investigated, someone in the next class was taking my work, painting out my name, then putting their own name on my work. I therefore had no work in the drawer. It looked to the teacher, (who was never in the class to actually know,) like I never did anything. Mom was right to stand up for me. And she did it because she knew me. She knew my love for art, and that I would never miss a chance to impress a teacher with my art.
God is like that. Sometimes when we do our best to please him, something goes wrong. When things go wrong, I often second-guess my decisions; I wonder did I forget to consider if I am doing His will. My daughter has actually asked me how to know when you are doing His will. I simply don't think it is possible to "do His will" 100% of the time. But if we are mindful of trying, the Lord knows us, knows our hearts. I have known Him to do like my Mama did, and step in to change things a bit.
_More tomorrow_
I Love you Lord, for stepping in and standing up for me. There have been a few times in life that I knew I was in your will, and someone else didn't give me credit for that. Some have dared to insist that being in your will meant being in theirs. Thanks for helping me know the difference. Amen
As we grow older, we learn that responding co-operatively to everything gets us in trouble. And some adults expect too much. Some parents can never be pleased. My Mom was like that about some things. You just couldn't do enough right. I forgave her, and tried my hardest, but some things were actually at odds with what I needed to do to keep my grades up at school. Like reading, she thought it was a waste of time. Mama never really cared about our grades. Well, I never remember her chiding us for a bad grade, but I do remember her standing up for me once when I got a D in art. I usually got A's and B's, and an occasional C that just tore me up. Not her, me. She knew about me and my art, and she knew I wasn't going to slack in that class. So she wrote my teacher a letter, and one to the principal, insisting my grade be changed. When the teacher investigated, someone in the next class was taking my work, painting out my name, then putting their own name on my work. I therefore had no work in the drawer. It looked to the teacher, (who was never in the class to actually know,) like I never did anything. Mom was right to stand up for me. And she did it because she knew me. She knew my love for art, and that I would never miss a chance to impress a teacher with my art.
God is like that. Sometimes when we do our best to please him, something goes wrong. When things go wrong, I often second-guess my decisions; I wonder did I forget to consider if I am doing His will. My daughter has actually asked me how to know when you are doing His will. I simply don't think it is possible to "do His will" 100% of the time. But if we are mindful of trying, the Lord knows us, knows our hearts. I have known Him to do like my Mama did, and step in to change things a bit.
_More tomorrow_
I Love you Lord, for stepping in and standing up for me. There have been a few times in life that I knew I was in your will, and someone else didn't give me credit for that. Some have dared to insist that being in your will meant being in theirs. Thanks for helping me know the difference. Amen
Thursday, May 19, 2011
I Haven't the faith...
When I was a little girl, my sister prayed for an ailment that had tormented me off and on for several years. When I was about 8, my hands and feet broke out and cracked so badly that just walking or using my pencil for schoolwork resulted in oozing liquid that hardened and cracked, which led to bleeding, on my papers and in my socks. My socks stuck to my feet, and made my shoes smell badly. Teachers wanted me taken to the doctor over and over; even though I had been and every very painful thing they had tried to help it was to no avail. The same teachers would not allow me to bow out of Phys Ed, so every squat thrust meant my shoes filled with blood, and hurt till I finally broke down in tears. Then walking home from school, which was exactly 3.14 miles when we measured it with the car, meant I could hardly take my shoes off my feet when I got home. But by age 11 or 12, they had discovered it was a dying of nerve cells that caused my ailment, and one specific doctor who discovered this, also helped me to monitor my emotional state. He felt that if I could calm myself, when stressed that I could possibly avoid whatever chemical things were going on to make the cells die, and I could avoid the breakouts to some degree. He was right. So even when we had a wreck one time, my fingers and toes were breaking out before I could get home. I did my routine to calm down, and drum up good things to thing about, and I would sing or paint, draw, something to get my mind off the stress, and by nightfall, the blisters had stopped popping up, and the attack was minimized.
But situations at my house, sometimes continued to be more stressful than all the techniques in the world would fend off, and my hands and feet would be so inflamed and itchy, oozing and bleeding, that nothing helped. It was on one of those nights that I couldn't sleep, because my hands itched so badly. I made the mistake of rubbing one of my fingers and it made it worse. The itching increased to a level that all I could do was rock back and forth in the bed. I awakened my sister, with whom I shared the bed, and she reached over and pulled my hands to where she could see them, and she just prayed that God would make my hands well. Then she went and told Mama what misery I was in and that she had prayed for me. Knowing her, she probably asked Mama to pray too. Mama brought ice I think, to numb the itching, and it worked enough that I could finally go off to sleep.
Next morning, there were no blisters, no cracks or oozing, no signs of cracks in the skin... Just new pink skin. From that time on, I only had one more bad attack, and it was when I was dating my husband. I believe the Lord wanted him to know that I had this affliction, and that I would need to do what it took to actively control it. Yet as an adult, my children have not seen it like when I was a child. Later, when my brother was born, he also had the same problem, but to my knowledge his never got as bad as mine had. The Lord chose not to heal me entirely, for it manifested in my mouth and throat at times during my working years, giving me cases of laryngitis that nothing would heal. In fact, I was often a member of a choir, or asked to sing at church, and one of my most severe attacks of laryngitis, left me unable to sing for over a year. But I will never forget how my sister's prayer, brought me relief and healing by morning.
The Lord asks us to do to others, as we would have them do to us. I have often wanted to pray for healing for someone and just see him or her become well overnight. Once, I prayed for Jimmy's Granny, and they sent her home in the morning. I always hoped my prayers had been answered.
But lately, I am numb. I don't have the faith to believe someone could be healed on the basis of my prayers. So all I know how to pray is that the Holy Spirit will honor God's word, and bring healing for those who pray. My sister's husband is dealing with lung cancer. She is believing for his healing so much so that she doesn't talk to anyone who speaks a word of doubt. It wasn't on my faith that I woke up that next morning with my hands all well. She isn't counting on it being my faith that will eventually mean that Larry is healed to whatever extent God will heal him. All I know how to pray is, "Lord do for her the same as you did when we were children. Nothing has changed. It is the same prayer. Would that the Spirit utter for us the things we cannot, and just bring healing to her family, to recompense the good that she did for me." And whoever, can pray with her believing, please do. Cause I can only pray, "Honor her prayers today just as you did on that day, In Jesus Name. Amen."
 |
| My sister's symbol that God hears her prayers is the presence of Geese. |
But situations at my house, sometimes continued to be more stressful than all the techniques in the world would fend off, and my hands and feet would be so inflamed and itchy, oozing and bleeding, that nothing helped. It was on one of those nights that I couldn't sleep, because my hands itched so badly. I made the mistake of rubbing one of my fingers and it made it worse. The itching increased to a level that all I could do was rock back and forth in the bed. I awakened my sister, with whom I shared the bed, and she reached over and pulled my hands to where she could see them, and she just prayed that God would make my hands well. Then she went and told Mama what misery I was in and that she had prayed for me. Knowing her, she probably asked Mama to pray too. Mama brought ice I think, to numb the itching, and it worked enough that I could finally go off to sleep.
Next morning, there were no blisters, no cracks or oozing, no signs of cracks in the skin... Just new pink skin. From that time on, I only had one more bad attack, and it was when I was dating my husband. I believe the Lord wanted him to know that I had this affliction, and that I would need to do what it took to actively control it. Yet as an adult, my children have not seen it like when I was a child. Later, when my brother was born, he also had the same problem, but to my knowledge his never got as bad as mine had. The Lord chose not to heal me entirely, for it manifested in my mouth and throat at times during my working years, giving me cases of laryngitis that nothing would heal. In fact, I was often a member of a choir, or asked to sing at church, and one of my most severe attacks of laryngitis, left me unable to sing for over a year. But I will never forget how my sister's prayer, brought me relief and healing by morning.
The Lord asks us to do to others, as we would have them do to us. I have often wanted to pray for healing for someone and just see him or her become well overnight. Once, I prayed for Jimmy's Granny, and they sent her home in the morning. I always hoped my prayers had been answered.
But lately, I am numb. I don't have the faith to believe someone could be healed on the basis of my prayers. So all I know how to pray is that the Holy Spirit will honor God's word, and bring healing for those who pray. My sister's husband is dealing with lung cancer. She is believing for his healing so much so that she doesn't talk to anyone who speaks a word of doubt. It wasn't on my faith that I woke up that next morning with my hands all well. She isn't counting on it being my faith that will eventually mean that Larry is healed to whatever extent God will heal him. All I know how to pray is, "Lord do for her the same as you did when we were children. Nothing has changed. It is the same prayer. Would that the Spirit utter for us the things we cannot, and just bring healing to her family, to recompense the good that she did for me." And whoever, can pray with her believing, please do. Cause I can only pray, "Honor her prayers today just as you did on that day, In Jesus Name. Amen."
Monday, May 16, 2011
Finding Connections
I have been looking at great length for my ancestors, and I have a rather large file, which I feel confident is highly accurate, because I have gleaned most of my information from piles of documents. I have stacks of cousins and family members that I can't get recorded in the more recent dates over the last 100 years. But the older ancestors, I have most things entered. I branched out trying to find the ancestral grandmothers, whose information is more difficult to search out. Their names were not included in the oldest info like Census records, but the one document, which most often includes them, is the marriage record. I researched at great length the life of an ancestral grandfather, who was shot at Chickamauga, Ga. during the Civil War, and who died in Marietta, Ga. and, we believe, is buried in the Confederate Cemetery there. But his wife, whom I highly admire for what she must have endured during those very difficult years, is someone I had not been able to find a connection that led to her parents, until today.
I know where she lived and is buried. I have pictures, and have been there. When I go there it feels like home, for I have a great love for the mountains where it is located. There are other families with her maiden name all around, but no records that I could find in the oldest records, which indicated her parents, lived nearby. Today, while gleaning in the 1820 Census very carefully for the names of known family members, I found an entry, near my other ancestors in that county, which was a misspelling, or old spelling for McIntosh. A female entry with 3 small girls, appears to be a widow, whose name is Rachael. (Had her husband not been dead, I would not have known her name.) However, her name is spelled McEntush. On that same document, I found an entry for a known ancestor, which was also a misspelling or old spelling. It was by coming to understand that his name was formerly spelled differently in several documents that I learned to search for various spellings in the first place. I looked very carefully once more for any other McIntosh/McEntush entries, and there was none. So this almost has to be my ancestral Grandmother's Mother. And thereby, she is also an ancestral Grandmother. I will want further documentation, but I am feeling good that I have found her.
Sadly, I entered it in the slot for her parents as Unknown McEntush and Rachael Unknown. But even though I don't know their full names, I know they existed, and have a record that they lived just where I expected to find them.
Now finding their parents will be tricky, because they probably came from Virginia, W. Virginia, or Kentucky. Or maybe Eastern Carolina... they won't be so easy to find. Till I do, I am just glad to welcome Rachael to the family.I may be able to find her husband's name,10 years earlier, when the 1810 census was taken, as newly married with one daughter. Also, I will search court records, if there are any, for land purchased or granted. And possibly the marriage records, from an earlier county name. And the cemeteries which I have learned to love visiting. You never know when you will find someone whose blood was the same as yours.
That's an odd feeling, by the way, when you suddenly discover you are standing by a previously unknown grave, of someone you are certain was a great grandparent of many generations back, and you realize their blood was what eventually made your blood. Their body is where the DNA for yours came from. It is an instant connection, and a feeling of thankfullness for the life they lived, especially if it was filled with hardship. I often cry when I find them, and I always thank God for them.
Today I want to thank God for helping me find this lady, who is one more in the list of living human beings of the past who would never know about me, but they are totally responsible for me. Because they lived and died, I am. And I also want to thank God that because Jesus lived and died, there was a day he welcomed me into his family, and entered my name is his book of the history of Children born into his family. And I am thankful that there is such a thing as records where someone was careful to protect the documents that allow me to find these people from my past. Now I have to find the cemetery where the McEntushes were buried and go visit them sometime.
Thank you, Lord, Amen.
I know where she lived and is buried. I have pictures, and have been there. When I go there it feels like home, for I have a great love for the mountains where it is located. There are other families with her maiden name all around, but no records that I could find in the oldest records, which indicated her parents, lived nearby. Today, while gleaning in the 1820 Census very carefully for the names of known family members, I found an entry, near my other ancestors in that county, which was a misspelling, or old spelling for McIntosh. A female entry with 3 small girls, appears to be a widow, whose name is Rachael. (Had her husband not been dead, I would not have known her name.) However, her name is spelled McEntush. On that same document, I found an entry for a known ancestor, which was also a misspelling or old spelling. It was by coming to understand that his name was formerly spelled differently in several documents that I learned to search for various spellings in the first place. I looked very carefully once more for any other McIntosh/McEntush entries, and there was none. So this almost has to be my ancestral Grandmother's Mother. And thereby, she is also an ancestral Grandmother. I will want further documentation, but I am feeling good that I have found her.
Sadly, I entered it in the slot for her parents as Unknown McEntush and Rachael Unknown. But even though I don't know their full names, I know they existed, and have a record that they lived just where I expected to find them.
Now finding their parents will be tricky, because they probably came from Virginia, W. Virginia, or Kentucky. Or maybe Eastern Carolina... they won't be so easy to find. Till I do, I am just glad to welcome Rachael to the family.I may be able to find her husband's name,10 years earlier, when the 1810 census was taken, as newly married with one daughter. Also, I will search court records, if there are any, for land purchased or granted. And possibly the marriage records, from an earlier county name. And the cemeteries which I have learned to love visiting. You never know when you will find someone whose blood was the same as yours.
 |
| Sarah (Sally) McIntosh |
Today I want to thank God for helping me find this lady, who is one more in the list of living human beings of the past who would never know about me, but they are totally responsible for me. Because they lived and died, I am. And I also want to thank God that because Jesus lived and died, there was a day he welcomed me into his family, and entered my name is his book of the history of Children born into his family. And I am thankful that there is such a thing as records where someone was careful to protect the documents that allow me to find these people from my past. Now I have to find the cemetery where the McEntushes were buried and go visit them sometime.
Thank you, Lord, Amen.
Wednesday, May 11, 2011
Baby Bug has found Crafting Ideas
On my children's theme page, called Scripture Pages for Ryder and his Friends, you will find the Baby Bug Posters to help teach about faith to youngsters. But following that theme, I found that Oriental Trading Co. has great projects and planning instructions for hours of fun based on bugs. Check out: http://tradingideas.orientaltrading.com/educators/k-6/lesson-plans/bugs-lesson-plan
Kids will love these projects.
I love Oriental Trading Co. It is a company I have ordered materials from for many years. In fact I discovered its catalogue when my children were small, and they are in their 30s now. Over the years, this company has continued to expand its kid-friendly products and planning and crafting market, to be the most informative up to date I know of. But the site isn't just for kids and teachers, and not just for inspirational materials. Wedding and party supplies are well thought out, and oh so affordable. I love this place!
Kids will love these projects.
I love Oriental Trading Co. It is a company I have ordered materials from for many years. In fact I discovered its catalogue when my children were small, and they are in their 30s now. Over the years, this company has continued to expand its kid-friendly products and planning and crafting market, to be the most informative up to date I know of. But the site isn't just for kids and teachers, and not just for inspirational materials. Wedding and party supplies are well thought out, and oh so affordable. I love this place!
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